Anxiety

Oh my. I cannot put into words how anxious I am right now. My guts are tugging with butterflies and a wolf. I'm exited and scared half to death at the same time. So exited that I have, thanks to all of you, over $1,000! That still leaves money for a visa, food and stuff to get for the orphanage. I know I'll get it. But, theres a little voice in my head going "What if you don't huh?" grr. I wish that voice would just go jump off a cliff. 
     Its that feeling that you got on christmas eve when you were a kid. "What will Santa bring? I really want a bike." that was my seven year old voice. My twelve year old voice is going "What will donations bring? I really want to cheer up there kids." I feel like everything about me is jittering, trembling, unable to think about anything but  "Will I go?". Even if you can't afford to donate right now, prayers are accepted. Donate here if you can. Hit the payola button and leave a comment here so I can thank you and send a sock animal if you want. Its crunch time now. 
     And to add to the jitters, my favorite American Idol just got voted off, Casey Abrams. :(. If you can, please, please, please, please, please donate. No one knows how much I want to go. Not even you Keri. I will include a diary entry of mine from a while ago, when I first found out I was maybe going, and from the night before. I know, diaries are supposed to be private, but, you guys should see this.
December 31, 2010, 
     Dear Diary,
        Tomorrow I get to meet Keri! She's my idol, even though I've never met her. I can't wait. I'm donating all of my money to her, to adopt again. I'm not sure of the kids name, but, its worth it.
                                          TTFN
                                                -Bridget
January 1, 2011
          Dear Diary,
               HAPPY NEW YEAR! And its very happy for me! Keri invited me to go to Russia with her in April. Now, how to raise money. If you were a person, I'd ask you what I should do. I'm so elated, it can't be put into words. We also have to get a passport. I wonder when I'll get there. If I get there.
                                  G'night
                                       -Bridget


Well, its off to bed, bye!!!!

Easter! 4 days to go.

As all of you know, Easter is coming up. Some say "Yipee! I get to eat chocolate again!" or "Good! I can have cheese again.". But what do I get to say? "Yippee! I get to kill animals again?". Does that sound right? Nope. Not at all. But, thats what I find my self saying a whole lot recently.

     You know, that probably did'nt sound quite right. I am not a hunter. Nor a evil scientist who kills animals for experiments. I gave up meat for lent. So, I find my self saying "Yippee! I can eat meat again!". What I don't get, is why this bugs me. I mean, no less animals are going to be killed because I don't eat them, I mean, maybe if the entire state of Texas stopped eating meat. But, my family is still going to eat meat. My school cafeteria will still serve meat.

     On the other hand, If I do continue to go vegetarian, others might join, and then we'd be saving animals lives, if the whole city was inspired. As of now, I'm stuck. I want to eat meat, for the nutrition, but I want to save animals.

     Its just like in the wild. Bear chases bunny. Bear kills bunny. Bear eats bunny. See? Its nature. Just, we go something like this: Humans find thousands of cows. Humans jam them into tiny little pens. Humans kill cows. Humans then pakage cows and then sell them to other humans, who then eat them.

     Thats an example of what the typical american chicken slaughter house looks like. And then, we eat them. How sick and tweisted is that. And your not going to get an entire nation to respond with a picture. Or a million pictures.

     And I'm supposed to make my mind up by Easter. Humph.

 "If slaughter houses had glass walls,

everyone would be vegetarian"

-Paul McCarntey

Go to http://www.meat.org/ and watch the video. I think I've made my decision, how about you?

Sorry about that!

Sorry about the 4 posts! Just have'nt gotten around to the posting part of the blogging!

This one just makes me crack up!



I dreamed about them!

Last night, I had a dream. I dreamed that I was at the orphanage. Sadly, none of the kids were there. Well, they were there, but, I woke up just as I was about to go into that room. I walked into the main room, and there were a bunch of people there. All of which spoke english. And then I woke up when me and Nastia were about to go into the kid room. Grr.

The grumpy week

Sorry guys! I haven't gotten around to posting in a while, so theres like, 4 posts from the past two weeks...

For those of you who have seen me this week, I am rather grumpy. If you will, I would like to offer an explication. Our state schools have this big tests which isn't really testing us on our knowledge, but is testing the teachers in how well they teach. So, in order to make their reputation look good, they push us to our limits in cramming knowledge into out brains. Then, after you get all stressed out, they pamper you. They tell you to sleep well, they give you bagels before the test, and it makes us kids rather annoyed.

    At least that's my theory.

Others take it so seriously, like their life depends on it. IT DOESN'T EVEN COUNT ON YOUR GRADE!!!! Sorry guys, I'm just grumpy. Grr.

    Any way, I now have over $300 dollars saved. And tomorrow I get to partake in a monopoly party. Me and two friends are dressing up in 30s attire and attending to guests at the party at the ATHÆUM. Then we are going back to Amara's house and sleeping over. This could turn out to be a pretty cool week. If I don't fall asleep at the keyboard right now!

"What would you do if I sang out of tune,

would you stand up and walk out on me?

Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,

and I'll try not ot sing out of key!

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends!"

-The Beatles

with a little help from my friends.

Anya!

I've got some pretty big news! I talked to Anya! I could'nt understand her very well, because she would'nt stick to one language. Nast was my "translator", but, she couldn't understand either. She was putting the little english that she knew and putting it with the Russian. So then, Nastia just translated what she said. She really wanted for them to go back, and when Nast told her that I was coming, she said "cool!" and that she can't wait!
I told her I couldn't wait too. I just wish I could get over there quicker.
     I'm alot closer now that I have a passport. The farthest away from home I've ever been is Florida. And now, I find myself taking a trip to the other side of the world! How lucky am I?

My best friend with her sister.

While you're far away and dreaming

For you die-hard Aerosmith fans out there, I know thats not the title of the song, Its "Don't want ot miss a thing.". That line though, is much more suiting.
     While all of the orphans are dreaming, of a better life, a family, filling food, I'm in school, thinking of them. Thinking of how greedy I feel when I march down to the lunch room, pull my burrito out of my lunch box, and chow down. I feel guilty even when I'm stuck at my mom's work some days after school. Its warm, I'm around people who love me and I have entertainment. And when I'm supposed to be "far away and dreaming" (aka lying there awake at 3am) I'll think about what G's doing. 2pm, hmm, she's in school. Whats P doing? She's too young to go to school. Is some one there to play with her, or just make sure she doesn't do any thing bad?
     What about you? What are you thinking about when you're "far away and dreaming"? Or tossing and turning, or wandering out to the kitchen to see what you're dog's barking at. Is there a little girl or boy over there that you need to adopt? There is for me. There is for many of you. Some already have them home. Others are still trying to bring them home. I just wish they knew that there were so many people over here who want them. Wish they knew. Don't you?
     I used to think that I was poor. Me? Poor? Ha! Just look at the world around us! Sure, we're not rich, but by the worlds standards, we are! 
     There's a Bible story that goes something along the lines of "There was a poor man begging for money, a rich man walks by, with $100, and gives half. A poor woman walks by, who has $0.01. She gives a penny. Who gave more?"  Now, answer. Most of you will say the rich man. But, that is not true. The rich man only gave half. The poor woman, gave all that she had to help others. Now, I feel like the poor woman, struggling a bit yourself, but giving everything to someone even less fortunate than you. Though, I'm not struggling.
     So, tonight, while your "Far away and dreaming", think of the kids over there, and what they need you for. You'll find your self on a plane over there too.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Where every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

-Aerosmith